Money's Going Into the Wrong End of the Whirlpool!

You ever score a goal on your own net? This is what the economic dodos are doing in Ottawa.

The economic chain is made up of the financial sector, the government sector, the business and service sectors and the consumer.

During the past 12 years, the consumers around the world have been working their tails off so that they can fulfill their destiny... consume, consume, consume!

But, the financial sector sharks got into an addictive feeding frenzy. Finally, they created so many trillion extra electrons in their computers that they couldn't pay their debts when some of the consumers couldn't pay for their consumption obesity.

But, when the government musc-rats heard about this they only saw their friends at the country clubs and fine hotel dinning rooms crying. They then offered to help these big bankers and businessmen who told the muscrats that by helping them, they would restore the economy.

Whoa! Any beaver with a Canadian education can tell you that it is the financial foxes and business bulls who manipulated the economy for their own benefit in the first place. These are the bad guys!

The beavers are now in big trouble in the USA and many other countries. Canadian beavers are also in trouble as their retirement savings have plummeted in value, their homes are sliding down the rapids, and their credit card interest rates have been increased to the formerly illegal usurious rate of 28%. Also, the babyboomer beavers are closing in on retirement and only 14% will have enough money to retire. The other 86% will be impoverished within 6 years of retirement!

Duh! Isn't it obvious that by pouring money into the top end of the economic whirlpool, nothing will come out the other end? Isn't it obvious that the way to fix this mess is to improve the financial balance sheets of beaver families and consumers?

It looks to me that the economic dodo birds got it backwards by recommending "Supply-side" fiscal policies. No - the fast and only solution is to follow the economic Owls who recommend "Demand-side" fiscal policies.

The federal, provincial and municipal muscrats need to get the puck down to the other end of the rink. Then we'll score lots of goals.

By the way, me and my beaver friends have lots of successful offensive plays if anyone is interested.

Bob the Beaver

Whose's Getting Stimulated and Where?

This budget ain't stimulating any beavers I know - except under our beaver tails!

The federal muscrats are going to spend $258b this year through all of their sticky-pawed bureaucats. Us middle class beavers know that 70% of this money will end up keeping the lodges warm and the stomachs fed of the 300,000-plus civil service union country club members and their millionaire boss plutocats.

If some money does escape, it is going to the loyal party supporters and their few thousand construction workers. I didn't know the workers were short of work. Have you ever tried to find a plumber, electrician or carpenter lately? Even the road and sewer workers seem to be falling behing in their jobs as it takes months to get their barriers down.

Even if the government guarantees some loans made by the banks and some obscure government agencies, things aren't going to improve for the autoworkers and white collar workers. There are oodles of loonies looking for good investments right now. So, the government is only going to guarantee loans to bad and risky businesses that will never pay the interest and principal back to the banks.

So guess who will have to pay back the banks? And guess who will have to pay the government for their losses? And just how are we middle class beavers going to do this?

Bob the Beaver

Budget Cheapskates

Charity must begin at the beaver lodge, as it sure as heck doesn't come from the miserly muscrats at the beaver dam(n) in Ottawa!

Here we are teetering on the edge of a bigger waterfall than the one on the mighty Niagara, and the government throws us 112 loonies to buy a leaky lifeboat. Those who earn $75k get a massive tax cut of $198 loonies. This won't even heat the lodge for a month this winter!

Boy, the spin they put on this generosity would make us think that as soon as we spend these crumbs from their tables, the whole economy will "snap" back into place. The only "snap" they will hear from our beaver lodge is the sound of our door closing in their face.

Bob the Beaver

Budget Not For Beavers

Did you see that slapshot?

Can you believe those muscrats in Ottawa?

With their provincial cousins, they are all planning to spend an extra $100 billion more than they will collect over the next three years.

Now wait a minute! I'm not a dumb beaver! Let's get this logic right.

As a middle class beaver, we give over 80% of the income taxes of $125b. If the government spends $100 billion more than they collect from us, then we owe the $100b. Then they spend this on themselves and their buddies, and in four years they want us to pay this debt.

Now, why would I borrow $100b, spend it on everybody else, and then pay back the $100b? This just doesn't make a wood chip of common beaver sense!

"Bob the Beaver"